- Men and women are increasingly divided in values, relationships, and political beliefs, weakening shared foundations of marriage and family life, Samuel J. Abrams and Joel Kotkin argued.
- Declining marriage, fertility, and dating reflect a broader cultural shift toward individualism and away from long-term commitment.
- Political polarization and the feminist movement have intensified gender separation, and the erosion of family and responsibility is threatening social stability, civic life, and the moral continuity of society, the authors argue.
Men and women are increasingly living in separate worlds and holding different beliefs, a trend that is threatening the views on relationships, marriage, and family that have long held society together, a recent essay from RealClearInvestigations argues.
Samuel J. Abrams and Joel Kotkin wrote that declining fertility rates and young adults’ disinclination to date or pursue marriage, together with the feminist movement and differences in political affiliations, are creating an “ongoing transformation” that presents challenges for the future of the U.S. and other Western and Asian countries.
“It’s undermining the traditional basis for stable families and communities and will have enormous implications for future demography, politics, and social stability,” they wrote.
Abrams and Kotkin argued that the feminist movement of the 20th century rewired modern society, leading to a preference for individualism and independence over relationships and a nuclear family. Americans are more likely now to think of marriage as risky or unnecessary and consider parenthood as a constraint on their personal freedom. Young adults are increasingly less likely to pursue relationships and have sex, a shift largely driven by women choosing to remain single or identifying as LGBT, the authors wrote.
Abrams and Kotkin also noted that differing political views have become a dealbreaker for many young adults. Young women are more likely to identify as liberal than young men, and in a culture where political polarization leads to cancellation and shunning of contrasting opinions, the alienation between men and women only continues to grow. The authors noted that similar trends are occurring in Europe as well.
The decline of marriage and children is causing “mutual fragility, and something of a slide toward social nihilism,” the authors argued. They pointed out that studies have found marriage contributes to higher incomes, less child poverty, higher fertility rates, and more happiness and satisfaction in life, and noted that as the world moves away from families and responsibilities, civic commitment is damaged and the foundation of countries begins to crumble.
The authors called for the creation of conditions that would facilitate healthy relationships between men and women, such as promoting homeownership and improving economic situations. They also urged the cultivation of a mindset “capable of integrating autonomy with obligation, equality with continuity, and liberation with responsibility.”
Abrams and Kotkin later added, “This is not a call for social regression but for a new realization that, as humans, we are not meant to be disassociated atoms but part of an organism that reproduces and passes on its values to the expected future.”
“Autonomy and obligation must coexist,” they concluded. “Equality and continuity must reinforce rather than cancel one another. Relationships must once again be valued as formative rather than restrictive. What’s at stake is moral survival.”
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